Swimming in thick mud
Constantly kicking, trying to stay afloat
If you stop for even a second
The currents will drag you under
Taking everything in just a moment.
I try to tear away
I try to unpeal the claws that are so deeply entrenched
Nails dig in, the hold tightens
The more I push and fight
The stronger the shackles become
The faster I’m towed backward.
The light is there but fading
The thick blackness swamps
It’s around my neck, my throat tightens
I have to stop screaming now
It washes over my face
I’m under, holding my breath
What’s the point though?
It seems my fate is decided, death.
There’s nothing pretty about this
Nothing poetic
It’s my eating disorder killing me
That is it.
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